O.K., folks, you know the drill by now: The “Saturday Night Live” opening sketch is a space for the cast and its alumni to run through their various political and celebrity impressions, and this week the setting was a rally for President Trump (played by the increasingly rare Alec Baldwin) held in Albuquerque, N.M. Or, as Baldwin called it, “the great city of Albacore, tuna capital of the United States.”
Dismissing the impeachment inquiry into him as a “Deep State conspiracy,” Baldwin introduced various supporters to come up and offer their interpretations of what was actually happening. Those supporters included Mikey Day as a member of Bikers for Trump, who said to the crowd: “All this man did was shake down a foreign government to get dirt on his political enemy. I mean, is that wrong?”
The crowd answered in unison: “Yes!”
“No, no, no,” said Baldwin. “The answer is no.”
The crowd replied, “Sorry, no.”
Other speakers at the rally included Pete Davidson, who identified himself as a member of ISIS. “I was a prisoner in Syria until last week when you freed me,” he told Baldwin. “So I just wanted to say thank you for bringing jobs back. To ISIS. And I promise that I will make ISIS great again”
Kate McKinnon appeared as Lindsey Graham and performed a short soliloquy modeled on Tennessee Williams’s “The Glass Menagerie.” Alex Moffat played a wild-eyed Mark Zuckerberg, reciting commands out loud to himself: “Project. Eye contact. Friendly laugh.”
Darrell Hammond, the longtime “S.N.L.” cast member who is now the show’s announcer, returned to his recurring role as former President Bill Clinton. He seemed surprised to have found his way to a Trump rally.
“Is that what this is?” Hammond said to Baldwin. “I just followed the party. But man, I wish I would have known that a president can be on the road like this, doing rallies. Can you imagine? Oh my Lord, I would never come home.”
When Baldwin’s Trump told him he was getting impeached, Hammond replied: “You are? You dirty dog.”
“No, it’s not for that,” Baldwin said. “They don’t mind when I do that, trust me.”
“Well that is progress,” Hammond said.
The last guest was Fred Armisen, another “S.N.L.” alum, playing President Recep Tayyip Erdogan of Turkey. He vowed that he was “treating the Kurds really well,” and when Baldwin said that they had a good friendship, Armisen answered, “Yeah, just like when Franco and Mussolini would take vacations together.”
Monologue Rap of the Week
Often the “S.N.L.” monologue is a place for the host to plug his or her latest project. But on this week’s episode, Chance the Rapper, who was the host as well as the musical guest, used the platform to deliver a likable song about his hometown, Chicago — also known as the Second City — and the virtues of liking things that were second best.
He was joined onstage by Kyle Mooney, a native of San Diego, which he described (unconvincingly) as the “Second City of Southern California.” They traded rhymes like:
Chance the Rapper: “Sense and Sensibility” is better than “Pride and Prejudice” / Never had Nintendo but I rocked the Sega Genesis
Mooney: I like Scrappy more than Scooby Doo / I don’t like Chili’s, but I love Chili’s Too
Chance: I like the Clippers, the Nets and the White Sox / I don’t have Netflix, I like Redbox
Later in the song, Mooney rapped, “I like Hannukahs more than Christmases / I don’t like islands, but I love isthmuses.”
A perplexed Chance asked him, “What’s an isthmus?”
“It’s a narrow strip of land connecting two bigger pieces of land,” Mooney replied.
“And that’s the second best to islands?” Chance said.
“For the purposes of this song, yes,” Mooney replied. “Just keep going, O.K.?”
Weekend Update Jokes of the Week
Over at the Weekend Update desk, anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che continued to riff about the impeachment inquiry into President Trump and the missteps of Rudolph W. Giuliani, the president’s personal lawyer.
Jost started in on Trump:
It’s been another less-than-ideal week for President Trump. A top diplomat confirmed the quid pro quo with Ukraine. Public support for impeachment rose to over half the country. And they even took Trump’s name off his own skating rinks in New York. You know you’re losing support among white voters when you can’t even appeal to ice skaters. Earlier today Trump fired back at all his critics with this tweet: four dots. That was the whole tweet. And while you might think it’s a mistake, it’s still up on his account, and it’s got 41,000 likes.
He went on:
Four dots is maybe the most ominous thing you could possibly tweet when you’re president, except what he tweeted just an hour ago, which was, “Something very big has just happened.” With no further explanation. Which with Trump, could either mean we just invaded Mexico or the McRib is back. [President Trump planned to announce further details on Sunday morning, following a United States Special Operations raid against a senior terrorist leader in Syria.]
Che then turned to Giuliani:
An NBC News reporter accidentally got a butt-dial voice mail from Rudy Giuliani in which he talked about overseas deals, Joe Biden and then asked for a few hundred thousand dollars. Now what the hell happened to Rudy Giuliani? I’m a New Yorker. I remember Giuliani coming out on TV, during 9/11, so calm and measured, and he told us not to worry. And now I watch him on TV, I’m like, Wait, did this guy even understand what was going on then? Or was he like Forrest Gump in Vietnam? Somehow Giuliani went from the mayor of 9/11 to the 9/11 of mayors.
Weekend Update Deskside Bit of the Week
Playing President Trump’s adult sons, Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump, Mikey Day and Alex Moffat were back at the Weekend Update desk, initially to remark on some earlier jokes that Jost had told about Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont. “Nice Bernie jokes,” said Day. “Can you believe it? They actually made fun of a Democrat. You like that, Eric?”
“I don’t get it,” Moffat answered.
They went on to say that it was not hypocritical of them to cast aspersions on Hunter Biden, son of former Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr. “We’d be running the Trump Organization even if Donald Trump wasn’t our father.”
He added, “There’s a word for when you get a job because of who your family is.”
Moffat replied confidently: “Uh-huh. Nipple-teasing.”
Fake Movie Trailer of the Week
Noticed lately how many movies are about disasters in outer space? “S.N.L.” has noticed too, and the show channeled its observations into a fake commercial for another film about the dangers of space. Chance the Rapper plays an astronaut who, in seemingly every moment before his mission, is warned not to make any mistakes. As his wife, played by Ego Nwodim, warns him, “You could crack your helmet. Spin too fast. Push the wrong thing and the top comes off.”
An announcer for the film (called “Space Mistakes”) describes it as “a film that asks the question: What if you messed up at work, but your work was space?”
Sure enough, one of the astronauts forgets to buckle his seatbelt and explodes.
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