If you want to win over your boss, never bring them only one solution to a problem; bring them two or even three potential options. Because of a weird psychological fear shared by most bosses, bringing them multiple options to solve problems will instantly make you part of their trusted inner-circle.
Now, to understand why this technique works so well, we need to understand the mental state of most bosses and the deep fear most of them share.
One of the greatest fears that bosses have is a loss of control. Think about the typical progression from frontline staff to leader. First, you’re in an individual contributor role; if you’re a programmer and there’s a problem in the code, you simply fix the code. Then you become a supervisor; if there’s a problem in the code, you might still be able to jump in and fix it yourself. Then you become a manager, and now you probably can’t fix the code yourself, but you’re very close to the people who will be fixing the code. When you then become a director, you can no longer fix the code directly nor are you personally close with the people who will. And if you then become a vice president, when there’s a problem in the code, you have to work through multiple layers to get the code fixed.
Each of these progressions away from being able to directly fix problems oneself causes a lot of bosses to feel anxiety when they face problems, because they know they cannot jump in and fix the problem themselves. In essence, a great many bosses are suffering from a perceived loss of control.
Given this brief psychological profile, let’s discuss how you can use it to immediately win over your boss.
Every day, week or month, you’re going to encounter problems. It’s not because your company is bad; it’s just a natural state of affairs that you’re going to experience problems. Maybe the problem is an angry customer, maybe it’s a conflict with a colleague, or it could be that some work product came out subpar. Whatever the issue, there are going to be problems you’ll need to run past your boss. And because you’re a well-trained high performer, you already know that whenever you bring your boss a problem, you should always come ready with a solution.
But here’s the catch; when you bring your boss one solution to a problem, you’re reinforcing the loss of control they already fear. They’re already anxious that they can’t jump in and solve problems themselves after they probably spent years doing just that prior to their current leadership role. And now we come to them and essentially say, “Hey boss, you don’t really have control in this situation, I’m just telling you what we need to do to fix this, and I only need you to sign-off on my decision.”
That’s not what you actually said, nor is it probably what you intended, but it is what most bosses hear. But this is easily fixed with one simple tweak. The next time you encounter a problem, don’t bring your boss only one solution to the problem. Instead, bring them two or three possible solutions and let them choose among them.
When you bring your boss multiple options from which to choose, you accomplish a few important things.
First, your boss gets to contribute, and they feel like they’re making a real difference in solving this problem. While many bosses gripe about having to solve too many problems, the truth is that they love solving real problems. They don’t love problems they view as minutia, but that’s not what we’re talking about here. When we’re in the world of significant problems with customers, products, etc., bosses like to contribute.
Second, when you bring your boss multiple options from which to choose, they don’t feel like one particular agenda is being forced on them. In fact, because they’re participating in the decision-making process, their defensiveness dissipates immediately. You know this yourself; when you feel like you’re being forced into a particular decision, you’re likely to get defensive. But the second that pressure abates, your blood pressure drops and your mood lifts.
And third, and this is the real kicker, when you bring your boss multiple options to choose from, they’re much less likely to meddle and micromanage. In fact, there’s a very good chance that they look at one of your options and just say, “I choose that one, go do it.”
If you had brought them only one option, it’s very likely that they would have tweaked and changed your option simply so that they felt like they were contributing. But when you give them multiple options, they get to have their influence exerted and feel some control without fundamentally messing around with your proposals.
This is a win for them and a big win for you.
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January 17, 2021 at 08:34PM
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Use This Trick To Instantly Win Over Your Boss - Forbes
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